Zack Snyder's Justice Lube 16: Artseid

Scene 15: Diana, Rogue Curator (47:48-50:54)

And now we come to the part where Diana raids a lost ark and demonstrates an unheralded power: the ability to drop at least thirty feet in expensive shoes without damaging the heels.

These three minutes are entirely dialogue-free and may be a groundbreaking example of what I’m going to call pre-exposition. That is to say, there’s a massive exposition dump coming up later in the movie, but this scene sets up the dump. It’s a visual suppository meant to loosen up the dense mass of information needed to understand the rest of the movie.

In this scene, Diana arrives at the temple where the flaming arrow of Artemis ended up. The most enjoyable part of this sequence is a series of quick cuts (quick for Snyder) as Diana assembles a makeshift torch: stake - rags - fuel - matches - lit torch. The camera doesn’t zoom in on the details, but the relative speed and fascination with process reminds me of Sam Raimi’s manic sequences such Ash making his prosthetic arm in Army of Darkness. These five shots are the closest thing you’re going to get to fun in ZSJL.

The next sequence also comes perilously close to being fun as well, but manages to avoid it at the last second. Diana drops swiftly from above onto an underground ledge. This temple has a genuine hidden cavern portion. We’re underground now, which means we’re about to get all Indiana Jones on Wonder Woman. Will she have to dodge darts or boulders or - nah, she’ll stick the arrow in a nook and a door will open into a room full of backstory-supplying murals. A missed opportunity.

The text on the temple walls appears to be modern Greek, so the Hellenophiles among you should be able to make out what it says. If not, Twitter user Unity_514 has a translation for you. It’s the story of the last great battle against Apokolips and Darkseid. Don’t worry though, it’ll all be spelled out later.

Compare and contrast: The theatrical release of Justice League does not contain three dialogue-free minutes of Gal Gadot walking around a temple, looking at a mural with increasing concern.